Parentpedia

What Experts Say

It's fascinating what kinds of things people say to pregnant women, and you can expect to hear lots of strange assertions and questions during the nine months, especially in the last trimester when the pregnancy is most obvious. Here's a sampling:

• Are you pregnant?
• I hope that's decaf.
• Can I touch your stomach?
• I just loved every minute of all four of my pregnancies!
• You're not going to keep working are you?

Hormone changes mean that you are more sensitive than usual anyway, and it's hard not to take everything personally, says Martha Brockenbrough, author of "It Could Happen to You! Diary of a Pregnancy and Beyond." Even though the questions and comments can be embarrassing, try to remember that people (from your sister-in-law to the man on the street) are often well-meaning.

It's important to keep a sense of humor about you when complete strangers ask you questions about your perineum, though it's not always easy. Here are some coping strategies:

Think up snappy answers in your head. Though, you don't necessarily say them aloud. When someone asks, "Are you having twins?" your silent answer is: "No, is your chin?"

Pretend you didn't hear. "When a person has to repeat the question several times, he or she might actually hear how it sounds," Brockenbrough says.

Answer a question with a (different) question (This technique works with 3-year-olds, for future reference). If someone says "I hope that's not a martini you're drinking," you answer, "Did you see the Pope's red Prada shoes? I didn't know you could wear those before Easter."