Parentpedia

What Experts Say^*

It's been a month since your baby's birth, and your husband is probably counting the days until you two can hit the sheets (and do more than just sleep)! You, on the other hand, may be wondering if you'll ever get that old feeling back again, especially if you're nursing.

How Breastfeeding Might Affect Your Sex Life

If you make love before your 6-week checkup, have your contraceptive plan in place.
Exclusive and almost-exclusive breastfeeding is more than 98 percent effective for the first six months if:

• your baby receives all sucking and nourishment by breast -- no pacifiers (this is exclusive breastfeeding),
• your baby receives no more than one or two mouthfuls a day of food, juice, water, or vitamins (this is almost-exclusive breastfeeding),
• have no longer than four-hour stretches in between feeds during the day and a six-hour stretch at night, and
• have no bleeding or menstruation (after day 56 following birth)

Other good choices while nursing include non-hormonal contraceptives, such as condoms, diaphragms, non-hormonal IUDs, cervical caps, and contraceptive sponges.

If you decide you would like to take the pill, talk to your doctor about using a progestin-only pill, which has less chance of affecting your milk supply.

It's normal to have a lower-than-normal sex drive.
Between the hormones and the common feeling of being "touched out," feelings of lust can take a nosedive. Whether or not you're actually having sex, keep the connection with your partner by kissing, touching, and hugging.

You may experience vaginal dryness.
This is due to your decreased levels of estrogen while nursing. Since it can be very uncomfortable to make love with little lubrication, be sure to include lots of foreplay and use a vaginal lubricant.

Your milk may eject during lovemaking.
The same hormone, oxytocin, which causes your milk to eject, is released during orgasm. You may find that your milk leaks or sprays, especially in the early weeks or months of nursing.

Nursing or expressing some milk soon before you make love can reduce the likelihood of leaking. You can keep a towel handy to catch the flow, pressing gently but firmly on your breasts with the heel of your hand.

Be prepared for interruptions.
Even the best laid plans don't always work out the way you hope. It may seem like your baby has radar, waking every time you and your partner are just getting into the swing of things. Take a break, nurse your little one, and then get back to the business at hand.

Rest when your baby rests.
You've heard this a million times, but fatigue is the biggest sex killer around. You might get that sparkle back in your eyes if you take care of yourself and get a nice nap with baby during the day.

Everything has changed.
It takes some adjusting to for both you and your partner, especially if this is your first baby. Your baby has become your priority now and your partner may feel like he is not even on your list anymore. Don't worry: Your sex drive is not gone for good! If you had a fulfilling sex life before, you'll have it again.